A SCARY MEMORY CAME TO ME TODAY

In 1986, I was in my early 30's and fairly new in the business of advising Business Owners about the succession of their business to the next generation. But, I was going on calls by myself at this point. 

One afternoon I was in Wilmington, DE having difficulty finding the business where I had an appointment. I accidentally turned up a ONE-WAY street to an opposing car (large Cadillac) coming right toward me. I made an immediate right into the parking lot of a deserted strip mall, to compose myself and look more carefully at the address on my 3x5 card.

Within a moment I realized, that pulled up next to me was the opposing car with an IRATE, VERY LARGE and IMPOSING black man behind the wheel, shouting at me to "GET OUT OF THE CAR!!". Stunned, I just looked at him and gently shook my head "No". He held up a BADGE and continued to SCREAM at me, "GET OUT OF THE CAR!!". I shook my head "No" again and pulled out of the parking lot to get away from him and hopefully to a more public place with plenty of people around. Thankfully it was still daylight.

He pulled up beside me AGAIN (on my right), and while driving was shouting and still shaking his BADGE at me. It was an unmarked car and at this point I was actually getting quite angry that a Police Officer would be treating me this way. I slowed down enough to read and write down his license plate number and decided I would march myself right into the closest Police Dept and make a complaint!

The entrance to a major highway was just ahead on the right (RT 95 going South). When he continued to go straight, I slowed down, got behind him and veered off onto that exit for RT 95. I felt a lot safer being on a major road and having left him back in the city, where I was unfamiliar.

I got off at the next exit and took myself towards the center of the city. As luck would have it there was a Police car pulled over and parked not too far in front of me. I stopped and asked if I could speak with him. I proceeded to tell him that I wasn't very happy with the way one of the Wilmington Police Officers had just treated me and wanted to make a complaint. He asked for the make and color of the unmarked car and the license plate if I had it, which I gladly handed over to him. He asked me to follow him into the center of the city to the Central Station.

Although I didn't know about GPS back then, I did have a cell phone (a HUGE one installed in my car console, if you can believe it) and while following him into town, I called the appointment to let them know that I had gotten lost and wouldn't be able to make it there that day.  We rescheduled.

When we pulled up in front of the WILMINGTON POLICE STATION, the Officer got out of his car and told me that on the way, he had run the plates on the car and that car didn't belong to a Police Officer. He asked if I had time to come in and look at some photos to identify the man in the car.

NOW, I got frightened and wondered where this was going to lead. He showed me about 10 MUG SHOTS and I quickly pointed to the man I had encountered. In the back of my mind I'm thinking, if this man has a MUG SHOT, he must have been arrested before. OMG!! 

He asked if I wanted to "PRESS CHARGES" and all I could think of was how LUCKY I had been to escape harm, how smart I was NOT to get out of my car when he flashed his badge, and then my imagination started going and I got SCARED and MAD - not only for myself but for my girlfriends who could have been in the very same situation.

YES, I wanted to PRESS CHARGES, with the hopes of stopping him from ever doing this again to a woman driving alone. 

YES, I wanted to PRESS CHARGES because who KNOWS what would have happened if I had responded to his demands. This man needed to be STOPPED!

YES, I wanted to PRESS CHARGES as an example to all of my girlfriends, of how they too should respond in a similar situation.

So, I TOOK HIM TO COURT.

Shaking while waiting to see his face again, I was semi-relieved when he didn't show up the first time. The trial was rescheduled.

I had even more time to think and let my imagination run wild and was even more scared to see him in person the second time. I asked my FIANCE to come with me for support, but "he had other plans that day at the shooting range" (er... at his old girlfriend's place was more like it, although I was just starting to put two + two together at this point).  His lack of support was one more reason why I would be DONE WITH HIM in the very near future!!  That's another story......

So, I arrived at the Courthouse alone.  I'm a big girl, I can do this....... I saw the guy come in and knew "this was it".  When he was called to the stand, he LIED and LIED and LIED. He said that when I drove up the ONE-WAY street, I was screaming profanities at him (he said all of them in Court too) and was giving him "the finger". He went on and on. When I took the stand, I told the TRUTH. I hadn't said one word to him, but only shook my head "NO".

I didn't find out that day, but he was found GUILTY and was charged. I never found out the full details of his sentencing, but I did find out that the BADGE he was carrying was to be used when he helped the Fire Police re-direct traffic when there was a fire. His BADGE was taken away. He also had been previously arrested for DOMESTIC VIOLENCE, which is why there were MUG SHOTS of him at the Station.

SOOOOO........ all of my friends learned from this situation that you DO NOT STOP FOR AN UNMARKED CAR, no matter how loud you are being yelled at to do so. You don't even have to stop for an unmarked car with a flashing bubble on top of the car. Instead, I hope you all know now that you should go to the nearest police station (if you KNOW where one is) or go to a lighted parking lot filled with people (like a WAWA or major store) and then contact the Police.

Today, with cell phones and GPS, we aren't as likely to find ourselves lost in a city where we aren't familiar AND we can now call 911 for help while driving. In 1986 less than 50% of the U.S. population had 911 service.

JOAN